Machinery Operator Pillows

'Well, they're just like your mom's cookies if your mom is a 35 ton, multi-unit dough extruder.'

Acme Construction Co. Today: Bob Simms on Excavator. Julio Garcia on Backhoe. Mike Hogan on Grader. Tony Rizzo on Compactor. Reggie Tucker on Pipelayer.

'Where are you going, I already locked out that pump.' - 'CARL'S on shift!'

For temporary relief of symptoms due to cold or flu. May cause drowsiness. Use caution when operating machinery.

'The company bought a machine to replace 20 of us, but it's too large to fit in the shop!'

A semi-automated coconut harvester.

'Business is booming.' - at Uncle Bert's Explosives

"OK guys - we'll show them how to dig for coal."

Caution: Do not try and make sense of our medical warnings whilst operating heavy machinery.

'He really wanted to get into the zombie role, so he became a Meth-Head actor.'

If nobody had invented graphics

"All our extras are ex-soccer players - they're the best at dramatically faking injuries."

Working in the Hazard Zone!

Future garbage truck driver.

"I fear one day our jobs will be taken over by technology."

"Legs together, David -- You're hamspreading again."

"Here's the deal, boys. We need to see a little more bickering. We're doing a Reality Show."

'Action!...Cut!...Right, everything else is CGI'

Local News in Heaven

'We're doing a fly on the wall documentary.'

Police film evidence

“Look! We’re on the naked cam!”

"... And in Canada today ... nothing happened."

"Come to think of it, I can't think of the last time I saw a monarch around here."

Time Clock

U.S. Manufacturing - Good News & Bad News

'He was a barman before he got into the demolition game.'

"In this scene, imagine you're sentient and know what feelings are."

'I found another pothole.'

A fly on the wall documentary.

"It's my extreme sports camera. I thought it would be cool to show my mom what I do at work."

The Making of a Gag Cartoon

'Damn ! I don't have a clue where we are.'

A convict escaping during the press scrum

'You don't know how much it would mean to me if you could just jump.'