Lyre Lover Pillows

'The next piece contains sex, violence, and Homeric epithets.'

Apollo

Lady Anglea

"I have your gender reveal results. Boy, girl, boy, boy, girl, girl, boy, girl, boy, boy..."

Rejected Titles For The Canadian National Anthem.

Archimedes statue with a lever

"If you could be any Bob Dylan you wanted to, which Bob Dylan would you be?"

Senta jumps into the sea

'Never mind singing it in rap... a simple 'I do' will suffice.'

"I understand the revisionists are hot on your trail, Professor Delauney."

Knight in shining Lycra!

Bashful in Nashville

"In my next album 'Gettin' Back', I refute all the strong beliefs expressed in 'Gettin' There', my previous album."

Jeff Tweedy caricature.

"This next one's called 'Song for Me'."

"Which way to the Mona Lisa? We're double-parked."

Musical genres

Karaoke night.

"I hate this time of year."

Jerry Lordan

'My love is like a red red rose...'

George Martin

'I changed my status from LLC to LL Cool C.'

"They can steal my bike, but they can't take my dignity."

"I'll be broadminded up in heaven, but here on earth you're still a whore..."

I'm a songbird. He's my lyricist.

"Hey, Dad, I've been working on a song for our family band!"

'Cole Porter has the lyrics checked'

"I'm stuck for the 'June-moon' rhyme in Serbo-Croatian."

We regret to inform you that your poem, "The Ramen," does not meet our publishing needs at this time. The short, frustrating career of Edgar Allan Typoe.

"Wait, so his first whole sentence was 'I don't want to work, I just want to bang on the drum all day'?!"

'Well, I thought crankbaits made really great stocking stuffers.'

'Horace spends his spare time being a rock critic.'

"I sympathize with how important it is to you, John... but I simply can't bless your lure!"

Chorister's Loose Teeth