Lover Of Workplace Comedies Pillows

"You're the boss! Tell your employees that if they don't stop calling you a 'mummy's boy' I'm going to kick their butts!"

IN box...OUT is wastepaper basket on fire.

'I'm promoting you to project coordinator because you seem to have an overall view of things.'

'Yes, can I help you?'

'We have a strict don't-ask-don't-tell policy for salaries.'

"Why yes, there was an extra five thousand dollars in my pay check last week...er...I thought it was a raise."

"You're a great team player - so we're trading you."

'You obviously took my suggestion to reduce stress to the extreme.'

"I appreciate the effort Carl, but I don't think you understand the swarm concept."

"'Tis but a scratch — in America, I'd still have to go in for work today."

'We're very proud of you, Jenkins. Keep up the good work.'

'Your resume seems in order, Mr. Lupo, but would you explain exactly why you want to work here> Mr. Lupo...?

"You might need to remind Mrs. Sanders it's 'bring your DAUGHTER to work' day."

The president of a company see a sign: While you were out we hit the lottery!

"Try unplugging it and throwing it out the window."

"I may need you to take the fall for the Swanson mess. So, goeth with pride."

'I've got an exciting new assignment for you. You're going to share one salary.'

"You have a killer resume, Phil, but unfortunately, we have all the dead wood we need right now."

"I'm sorry, but Fred isn't available. He's spending a few days in the penalty box for not being a good team player. May I help you?"

'I'm on the way to a meeting. Go back to whatever you weren't doing.'

'The firm is downsizing, Oglethorpe -- tell everybody to scrunch up.'

Group of people.

"We've decided to give you a bonus, Rick. It's any change you find under the cushions."

'Miss Barnes, cancel my appointments. If I start swimming now, I can be back in the office in a few weeks.'

"My boss said I have narcolepsy. She could have waited to tell me after I woke up."

"Ziegler, I'm transferring you out of the energy commission!"

'You do a fine job guarding the place, we just need you to shed less.'

"Most people would jump at an opportunity like this."

Unfortunately, Lyle had already sent nasty e-mails to his boss, three vice-presidents and the CEO.

'I talk the talk but I don't walk the walk.'

'I can't work with computers, on account of my animal magnetism.'

'Its simple: we're the nanotechnology department.'

'I put Wilson on your project and last I heard he was all over it!'

'Mind if I head off a little early today?'

"We're restructuring - Wednesday moves to Friday, Tuesday becomes Wednesday, Monday stays where it is and Thursday and Friday will be merged with the weekend."