Lover Of Words Pillows

"May I write a poem about you?"

Reflection greeting cards.

'A moiety of twa is still ae.'

'I think he would come back to earth if women would just stop kissing him.'

Sensitivity Reader's Digest

I think you'll find that I'm easily encouraged. For instance, the fact that the two exclamation points above your head are tempered by one question mark gives me great hope. !?!

A pretention of playwrights

'Do you always have to shout? Well? Do you? Huh?'

'Diver caught scallops - is that a description of what happened or a compound adjective'

Irritable Vowel Syndrome: "EEEIIIOOOAAA AUUUEEE!!"

The Oxford Comma Coin

'To be honest, it's a bit hard to swallow.'

Harmon Silas, calculating the thousand words his picture is worth, wonders what do do with contractions.

"No, I said to swab the deck!"

"Not that kind of hare, Rapunzel!"

Professor Ernie's history of philosophy. Rene Descartes had a difficult childhood. I think, therefore I am! I know you are, but what am I?!

'Well? - Now that we've learned to talk, aren't you going to admit that you were wrong?'

Sign on Roget's Thesaurus, Inc.: 'Absent Ingesting Comestibles'

'Yes, I speak perfect English, I have to 'cause you English are too bloody lazy to learn French!'

"I think our daughter should change her major. She can now ask for money in 3 different languages!"

"No, those people aren't anorexic. Those people are starving."

Barbed Pen

"We’re leveraging knowledge of niche opportunities to maximize strategic advantages."

It was a match made in heaven.

" ... and this is my wife - I'm legally obligated to tell you that."

"Make up you mind - do you love me completely or love me to bits?"

Oh, that's Humpy's girlfriend, "Hunky Dory."

Business School - Center for the Study of Mumbo Jumbo - 3rd Floor.

"Mom, Dad, sis-I'm not like you. I'm-I'm not a palindrome."

Exclamation Marks chasing the Question Mark.

"He says he's a Professor of Rhetoric but I'm not persuaded."

"Well, I'll be - he cut and ran."

Dislecksick Sipport Grewp.h

Palindromedary.

G.K. Chesterton.