Lover Of Dad Jokes Prints

You can't just switch them. If your wife asked you to change the baby, she probably meant the diaper.

'The brown one that smells like an old man.'

"As weed-whackers go, it's a little quiet for my taste."

"I don't think the crackling sound coming from your lower back is as serious as you thought. Just relax and I'll have this Rice Krispie Square out of your back pocket in no time."

"Have you seen my wife?"

Hunting safety rule #1...Don't go hunting with Larry.

Cry babies.

"Awww man. My nuts are so old they're wrinkled." "Tell me about it."

'He's bound to wake up sometime!'

"What do you call a person who only eats corn?"

Nobody mourned Sir Dad-Joke.

"Look, honey, I got dinner on line!"

Next to Nothing

'That's a picture of my granddad with shoulder length hair and a beard. That's why mom calls these albums hair looms.'

"I love my new tie! I'll wear it to work tomorrow." "The report'll be done shortly." "Excellent!"

Hammer and chisel discussing what they've been doing, chisel says; 'Oh you know, getting into a few scrapes.'

Official Team Cap With Beard

Note Book

"How much did it cost to have your ears pierced?"

"Sure was a lot of screaming for the happiest day of your life."

"Bad news. Your use-by date was a month ago."

"It's a dependent!"

Looky... It's Bat'minton... I'll see myself out."

"OK...what's the quickest way to the hospital?"

"Okay, I'll change your diaper, but you better not tell any of my patients."

'Good one Dad. Imagine your catch if you had bought us REAl fishing gear.'

Child on a schedule.

'Dad, I need help with chemistry, what's the periodic table?'

"Oh no, the lectern and microphone. I get the feeling I'm getting another one of your boring life lectures."

"What happens if you get the headphones in the wrong ear?"

'In this rare photo of President Bush standing beside former President Clinton, one can't help but notice how the weight of office has grayed their hair.'

"Sergio, you are the best father in the world. Except, you know, when you're not."

'What'd you make dad' - 'It's a snowman, with his ugly, ungrateful son,'

Vasectomy Clinic: Convert to Unleaded Here

"Someday you'll understand the ways of the world...with the exception of tax and health insurance forms."