Lost & Found Philosopher Pillows

Lost and forgotten department

Emergency Phone.

Goldfish bowl on raft...

"Ideas that jump from noggin when head not yet screwed on."

'Agreed, 40 years is a long time to wander around, but think of the travel expenses.'

"Hang on, I know I came into the kitchen for something..."

"I won't have anything to worry about when I grow up."

"My feeling is that while we should have the deepest respect for reality, we should not let it control our lives."

'Do you have anything for absent-mindedness?'

'He's studying to go to university' - Student reading book; 'HOW TO LIVE ON NO MONEY'

"Hey - let's not us re-invent wheel."

School of hard knocks: Mail box 'Knock-knock jokes'

"Oh my God -- I just remembered I can fly."

Elderly man at top of stairs with a revolver and an axe: 'I've completely forgotten why I came upstairs.'

Quiet!

"2 glasses of wine at lunch, I think I'm Socrates..."

'Tonight the remains of Jimmy Hoffa have finally been discovered with what appears to be millions upon millions of unpaired socks.'

The brain cell that was suppose to help me remember.

Let me warn you, toots. Celebrity is like radioactivity: you start with a big bang, then comes years with a half-life of slow decay.

"Honey, I'll be right back – I forgot to stop at the bar on the way home."

Man reading 'Amnesia volume 1' while having a bookshelf full of 'Amnesia Volume 1'

"Poop. I forgot my coffee mug was on the roof of the saucer."

I've come back here to remember what I forgot in the first place.

"My flight’s been delayed for the third time—whom do I punch in the face for that?"

Interior Monologuist

'If you keep running away, son, you'll never make it through your formative years.'

'Do you need me to remind you when your wife's birthday is too?'

G7

"I keep forgetting it's not Christmas,"

'Relax, I just wanted to know if you wanted to break for lunch.'

"Now, what am I here for?"

"I forgot to pay the light bill. I swear, I would forget my head if it wasn't screwed on."

"You never solve your problems. You simply outlive them."

"The universal remote. That's how God rules the universe."

Annual Amnesiacs Convention.