Long-term Love Navigator T-Shirts

'We've been thru a lot together.'

"Focus, Gerald, focus!"

In the Guru District

'Now what brings you lovely people here?'

'Bob, I know you're a Mockingbird, but a few compliments every now and then would greatly help your marriage...'

"Just keep quiet and listen to what we have to say."

"We'll always have couples therapy."

"No, I really DO love you. It's just that my committee has some issues."

Couples' therapy

'Great Therapy!'

"She wanted to go to the beach. I wanted to golf."

"What's going on Jen? Why didn't you respond to my kissing emoji?"

"I've switched my energy provider, and I switched my broadband provider. Now I want to switch my misery provider."

"Ooooooh, just what I wanted!"

"He keeps reissuing everything I take issue with."

Reading the sports pages.

"Yeah. But he's a handful."

"I've been out of the dating scene a long time. Is kissing still a thing?"

"Of course I won't forget to tell you when quarantine's over!"

"There's something I have to tell you."

"Do we go out or do we stay home and open a can of worms?"

"When we first started seeing each other, we would always use the same word for snow."

"Store policy is that I need a note from your wife."

Everyone agrees: Aunt Juanita needs a man.

"If I ever start turning into my father do me a favor and don't turn into my mother."

"Y'know, I don't know what I'd do without her, but I'd sure like to find out."

"Want to deal with some unresolved issues or just get another movie."

'Your wife says you act like a fool. I thought you said she never pays attention to you.'

"Twenty five years... I think it's time we renew our towels."

Okay, I'll admit I was wrong. But I won't say what I was wrong about.

"You kept me awake all night, grinding your gums."

Can we talk about our attorney-client relationship?

'When I said I would move mountains for you, it was just a figure of speech!'

The Love Psychologists