Loan Rejection Pillows

"So, we've processed your loan application and I'm afraid that it doesn't look too promising!"

"I’ve combined all your outstanding debt into what we here in the banking business like to call a honkin’ big loan."

"I'd like to thank my parents and my creditors for making this possible."

One of the failed candidates for the copyrighters job wants to know 'wat was rong with his applicashun'.

"If you miss a payment, we show up and embarrass you in front of your friends."

worker rejects promotion to protect deniability

'I'm sorry, Bennett; but we gave the job to O'Toole. You have the know-how, but he had the know-who.'

loan

'Welcome graduates, parents, guests, faculty, and home equity loan officers.'

'Of course I have unpaid loans, what other kind is there?'

"Sorry, but no. I can't lend you a student to help clean up your yard."

'That was Mr.Osgood, sir. He's just made his final payment.'

'Sorry, but I don't think you're right for our company.'

And your repayment period starts...Now!

"Why does your men's clothing store need a loan?" "During the pandemic sales of pants have dropped way off."

"So I figure, as long as I stay a student then I can't repay my student loans."

Today's Banking Industry: "We're too big to regulate!"

Student Debt

'Well, Gosh...! How did you know I was an incoming freshman...?'

'I suppose a loan to send them to summer camp could be called a home improvement loan.'

'You'll need a better credit rating before we can give you a credit card?'

Loan trap

Your credit score is hahahahahahahah.....

"If you had $1,000, and I asked you for a loan of $23.47, what percent of your original money would you left?"

It's sweet of you to ask, Randy, but I've decided just to rent some Mel Gibson movies instead.

'We're worried about your ability to lend us money.'

'This is big ... a bank is actually approving a loan.'

"You can't lend me the £100 I asked for, only £70? Don't worry, you can own me the rest."

'Did you get the promotion?'

'Do you have poor credit? . . . Visit paydayloanshark.com for instant cash!'

'I'd like to borrow enough to buy this bank.'

'No, no, of course I think you're beautiful ... it's just that, ever since you showed me those baby pictures of you ... well, I just can't seem to get those images out of my head.'

"Full disclosure: I served five years for bank fraud."

"Simplified application form? This IS the simplified application form..."

"Have you considered applying for a job a million mils from here?"