Loan Joker Prints

'I suppose a loan to send them to summer camp could be called a home improvement loan.'

"I’ve combined all your outstanding debt into what we here in the banking business like to call a honkin’ big loan."

"I know this is not a proper job for a PhD, Mom, but I have student loans to repay."

"I'd like to thank my parents and my creditors for making this possible."

'They're being damn noisy in the hospitality box next door,'

Bank cashier sits near sign: 'Please do not ask for credit, as refusal often offends'.

'We decided the current system for reviewing corporation tax was too complex so we'll trial the 'think of a number and then double it' method.'

During his financial report to the board of directors, Ted hits the poignancy button by mistake.

"If you miss a payment, we show up and embarrass you in front of your friends."

Sales - We could try a 'free offer' but it would cost us.

'Wait a minute....!

"I can always tell a permanent temp from a temporary temp."

"Let's change table stakes to vacation days."

Just a little heads up!

"Graduates, faculty, parents, creditors..."

"Whoops! There go those darned interest rates again!"

'Of course I have unpaid loans, what other kind is there?'

"Sorry, but no. I can't lend you a student to help clean up your yard."

'The shareholders are in an uproar; they demand change. Bob, switch seats with Gerald.'

"Could you stop referring to the interest rate as 'the vig'?"

Ever sensitive about its image, the IRS tries a more service-oriented approach.

Yes we can increase your overdraft, but I'd like to see a little more grovelling, please.

"Yes, we've refused your loan application."

'A loan, certainly, how much would you like?'

Student Debt

"Yes dear. But, I don't think you're actually supposed to dispose of your disposable income."

And your repayment period starts...Now!

"So I figure, as long as I stay a student then I can't repay my student loans."

"Does this mean my loan has not been approved?"

"We've got borrower's remorse."

'How much do you want?' - 'How much have you got?'

'I'm working on a ten year degree. Four years in school, and six years to pay off my student loans.'

'I mistakenly thought that 'mutual' meant the funds were equally mine to use.'

'Well, Gosh...! How did you know I was an incoming freshman...?'

"O.K. final question: I'm thinking of a number between one and 100."