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Glastonbury. After.

"M'lady, we’ve reached peak Brooklyn."

"Here's another one written in E minor and in case you haven't guessed by now, it's the only chord I know."

'It's good - but it's not digital quality.'

'Nothing beats seeing your favourite band play live.'

"Hey, pal, let's hear 'Doggie in the Window' again, and this time play it like you mean it!"

Jazz quartet, piano, bass, sax and drums

"Woke up this morning, someone had nicked my guitar..."

At the rock concert...

"Free Bird!"

Occupational Hazards.

"Thank you! That last tune took some fancy fingerpickin'. Apologies to those in the front who may have gotten a press - on nail or two in their drink."

"I've got those 'Don't worry about me, I'll just be here, all alone' blues."

"It's really important to me, as an artist, to make you feel like drinking more than usual so I get hired back."

'Your drug test came back positive. Welcome aboard.'

"This next song I wrote I won't sing due to political correctness."

A man and a woman discussing the skill of the pianist.

'Nobody pays for music anymore.'

"We'd like to do a song that will barely penetrate your consciousness as you continue to enjoy those faddish cigars and single-malt scotches."

Towny Music Night.

"Unfortunately, father never quite got over being asked to reform the band for Live Aid in the '80s."

'Howard can't come to the phone now. He's standing by for a major concert announcement.'

Open Mike for the spotlight operators

All Les's dreams of stardom were coming true, and he'd only played one note.

"When it comes to good, old-fashioned roots music, this guy is the BEST!"

"We tried six speakers, then twelve, and finally we put in the Pittsburgh Symphony, yet we still feel something is lacking."

"Cultural economy - keep it going."

A rock guitarist singing