Little Listener T-Shirts

'Music hath charms,' &c.

Audio Books

Try me/try me/try me...

"I need him to stop think and start listening."

'Not even close man - easy listening's around the corner.'

I can hear a podcast of yesterday's sea.

It's a picture book. The words aren't called "subtitles."

"So you can tweet. That's why you have to learn the alphabet."

'There you go again - trying to solve my problems. I am not asking you to do that. I just want you to listen to me.'

"Go ahead. Tell me your troubles. I promise to say 'Awww' in all the right places."

Attention Span Man

Psychiatrist with bartending diploma

"First buttons, then zippers, now we learn to tie our shoes. Is mom trying to tell us something?"

'Books are okay, except they only get one channel.'

"I feel like my emotional baggage is permanently stuck on the luggage carousel."

"The Doctor is just wonderful!! He listens to all my irrelevant, boring stories!"

"If you think I talk too much, you should come right out say so! That way we can talk about it."

Science Applied to Art

"I'll knock 10% off this session as I wasn't really listening."

"Doctor, I find you very easy to talk to."

'Time-outs might have more meaning when I learn to tell time.'

Onstage with the transgenic singers...

'I wonder if TED ever listens.'

WELCOME TO KINDERGARTEN, 'It's okay, I guess, but they sure hassle you about compliance!'

'She doesn't know that listening is not the same as mentally rehearsing her answers.'

Here's your problem. You have an iPod.

"Repetitive strain injury?...theres a lot of it about."

'It's nice that you've learned to tie your shoes, but you're really too young to quit while you're ahead.'

Today, this humble feature attempts to answer one of the great quandaries of modern times. Is it Louie Louie, oh baby, my hair gotta grow? Wrong! What are the lyrics to the Kingsman's Louie Louie?* *Must be gleaned by listening. No peeking on the internet!

'How 'bout finishing the story, mom. It's past dad's bedtime.'

Apparently I didn't learn enough. They say I have to come back tomorrow. Welcome to Kindergarten.

Child with headphones at opera

Stork and baby

Harold finally decided to take his psychiatrist's advice to become more receptive.

"How did I get to be the only one that listens?"