Little Brawlers Pillows

'Who gave you that black eye?'

'I appreciate how you feel, but I'm afraid your report card isn't grounds for defamation of character.

Well, we thought we had childproofed the house

"Another reckless baby driver! I'd arrest the whole lot of them if they weren't so damn cute."

"I couldn't possibly lick another baby right now."

Toys in the DVD Player.

'Beware of teething baby.'

"Why do small children ask so many questions?" "Why not? We need to learn, don’t we? Anyway it’s no big deal is it? Isn’t that what parents are for? You were probably the same, weren’t you? So why complain?"

'Hey, Mom, here comes Frankie's tailor!'

Climbing with the baby

"I'm with grandad now - yeah, he's fighting fit."

Baby zipping himself up then going to sleep

'They had three puppies and four kids before me: It's almost impossible to find a piece of furniture that hasn't been chewed on...'

'Gee, Dad, Mom's getting better at this all the time!'

I think these suits have feet in them so we won't leave prints

Babies

'I put lint tape all over his onesie so that, as he crawls around, he picks up the dog hair.'

'Well, your wife is now a den mother! You have triplets!'

Impractical Guide to Having Babies: 'Winter Clothing'

I'm fed up with cleaning your room! From now on, wipe your feet!

'Getting other people's toddler's leftovers on a highchair is one thing, but getting their toddler, too, is another.'

"When do I get my phone call"

"There's a grouch on my couch."

Handbags at dawn. A typical bout of fisticuffs on the rugby pitch.

Welcome,dear, to the Garden of Weedin.

The First Supper

Tantrum Scene Do Not Cross

'He's at the 'terrible twos' stage.'

Burnt Out Dolls' House

Kitchen Appliances Fed Up With The Baby.

'Occupational hazard.'

"But it's been five whole minutes! How can you still be mad?"

"And the awards for Best Actor in a Leading Role, Best Costume Design, and Best Sund Coordination... the Anvil!"

As you like it - Parisians who will never be under police supervision

Bar bouncer resumes.