Literature Critic Pillows

"The world isn't ready for a book like this. How would you feel about publishing it posthumously?"

"You may already be a Nobel Prize winner!"

"I understand the sex scenes have been removed but the balanced-budget and term-limits scenes have been left in."

'He's a parody of a tired genre.'

Fyodor Dostoevsky

Early Reading Group . . .

"It may only be two sentences long but I've finally done it. Written the great male romance novel."

"That's the guy I hired to read Proust for me."

Bob encounters one of the bugs in the Jean Paul Sartre fan website.

Ed Flanders, Deconstruction Worker

First Novels.

Thomas Mann.

"Now I really hate poetry."

Blue Stockings

Jean-Paul Sartre

'Look! The new long awaited, highly anticipated but ultimately disappointing novel by that guy you like.'

Why we need poetry. . .

German Expressionist Breakfast

"It turns out everyone here is self-published."

It's Dostoevsky. It's Melville. It's Flaubert. But it doesn't dance.

Shakespeare was bisexual

"His exercise wheel has lost all its fascination sinces he started reading Hemingway."

The Proust of Twitter

Dating an English Major

"Oh, this old thing?"

Emily Dickinson: Mime - "I think she's saying something about death."

The Forbidden Joyce Kilmer

"I did the math. If we want to read all of Proust in this lifetime, we have to start tomorrow morning."

George Orwell

Günter Grass

"Tracey, this is Gene. He also read the Nancy Reagan book in unbound galleys."

"Nevermore." "You don't have to use 'air quoths' every time."

"The moral of the story, honey, is that being a celebrity does not make you a credible children’s book author."

Shakespeare loved a grammar joke

Beckett for Beginners: "Waiting for Thumbkin"