Literary Professors Gifts

'Well, you know what they say...give a million monkees a million cell phones and they'll eventually text the entire works of Shakespeare.'

"To torture an insect or not to torture an insect, that is the question."

'I'm reading aloud, Jeremy - My lips are SUPPOSED to be moving!'

Blue Stockings - Woman revealing herself as author

Ed Flanders, Deconstruction Worker

'Hmph. College kids.'

Thought for today: "All the world's a stage." - Shakespeare. And boy, are there a lot of drama critics.

Thinking Gears

"You're going to hate yourself."

'If you were disturbed by any issues raised, please call your mum.'

"Russ had a novel published two hours ago and has a children's book coming out in 20 minutes."

Victor Hugo

Mr. Metamorphosis: "At least this better than waking up as a cockroach."

Frontispiece to the first volume of 'Master Humphrey's Clock'

Nathaniel Hawthorne

Captain Ahab searched for a vaccine.

'Hamlet'

Shakespeare does stand-up comedy in the round.

"Once upon a midnight dreary / while I pondered weak and weary."

1599: Shakespeare's Agent knew what the public wanted

"Not to be a motion picture - will remain just a book'

'Assuming their porridge was poured at the same time, how could it then be too hot, too cold and just right?'

"Now Playing: One of those Jane Austen movies."

Gone With the Wind: The Beach Blanket

"‘Extra vile old ox’? No, sir – it stands for ‘extra virgin olive oil.’"

"I know this is not a proper job for a PhD, Mom, but I have student loans to repay."

William Shakespeare sitting at a desk

The Demise of Tinkerbell

William Shakespeare a.k.a. Francis Bacon, Earl of Essex....

Shakespeare was bisexual

It's Dostoevsky. It's Melville. It's Flaubert. But it doesn't dance.

The First Draft. . . Moby Duck.

'So Captain Ahab, I put it to you that you were deliberately stalking my client!'

'This has all the makings of a fable. But first lets take lots of tests.'

"I'm in a catch-23 situation."