Lion Trainer Pillows

'It has to have tall fences.'

"Sorry I'm late, I've brought cappuccinos for everyone."

Lion trainer interviewed whilst lion eats camera operator.

'That's right. Bad breath. You've got bad breath!'

'Personally, I don't like to play Fetch, but it makes him happy.'

"You do realize you can't take that one home."

Life with a professional baseball catcher.

"Why won't you teach us how to handle complaints?"

"Quick, start the car!"

I'm going to practice on you before I start managing other people.

"Any questions?"

"Yeah, he's cute but don't approach him. He's a service human."

'Now THAT'S a presentation! Great delivery, great graphics, and he moonwalks from the room.'

"Cross-breeding oops #1." "The Cougadooodle"

'Every night it's the same - always my turn to put the Bally Cat out!'

"What I'd give for a stimulating conversation..."

"I'm not sure about this new trainee - he asked me when does he get to see the actual ropes."

How to deliver a successful presentation.

"Any questions?"

'One of the new targets is targeting which targets we're meant to target.'

'He's not supposed to go out.'

Litter Tray Training

"Good news...I found a doctor who says you can still play!"

"The anger management consultant said he wasn't going to alter his **** dates at this t****stage which fits in with the 'managing change' consultant who said it was to late to change her plans..."

Funky Facts: Monkeys.

"I believe I can create a great presentation if I can only tap into my cognitive dissonance."

'Listen Sonny, I don't want or NEED to get to the other side!'

Hanging off every word...

Quality Control

A mime and his pet parrot talk to one another.

"The GOOD news is that 94 people want to attend the leadership training, the bad news is that 64 of them want to change the venue, 56 the time and 45 want to be course leader."

'First of all, relax.'

'Let's go! Let's go! Hustle! ...Relatively speaking.'

"All you're doing is emboldening cats."

"Try not to think of them just as a 'customer' but rather as your only chance of paying your mortgage and putting food on your plate."