Linguistic Maestro T-Shirts

'You ask him to sing. I don't speak Italian.'

Nathaniel Hawthorne

'Can you play something the dog doesn't know?'

"Still suffering from writer's block?"

'In today's market hyperbole was up sharply. Similes and metaphors held relatively steady with euphemisms hitting another record low.'

Quartet of chefs.

"I bet you can't name one person who makes a better lengua casserole than me!"

Romantic Glass Blower

"Carpe pizza"

Giuseppe Verdi

No Bruch!

'We're going to look pretty stupid if it's not a Michelin star.'

Violinist.

'A 'pregnant pause' is effective only if you've already said something.'

Ventriloquism For Beginners.

'Once a donzel, the dyvour now settled for orts.'

"And here's one I made up called 'Mama's Last Nerve.'"

'Hey! Did you suddenly forget English? Get in here!'

Spatula Conductor

Lord of the Strings.

Thanks for being such a fabulous desk partner!

The violin lesson

"Whoa, too much information!"

" ... para Espanol ... "

"You sure know how to talk to sales clerks!"

Nice speech, but you don't have that many friends. You better add "Romans and countrymen."

"For his next picture, my client wants creative control, script approval, and a percentage of the gross. Is that clear?"

A writer types onto a long sheet of paper.

Double Bass.

'... And now I shall pass you over to tonight's speaker who will give a brief summary of my introduction.'

Niccolo Paganini

"I would take out the curse words, but otherwise I think it's fine."

"So, you've got butterflies in your stomach, a bug in your ear and a bee in your bonnet. Any other complaints?"

The Violin Artist

Romance Music