Linguistic Juggernaut T-Shirts

'The nice thing about dictating a letter is you can use words you can't spell.'

"...but the big question is, does the competition know that we don't know what we don't know?"

"Better than a business model, I have a business scheme."

Wordplay: In The Bag.

Ninedency: A budding tendency

'Technically, I was making fun of your writing ability.'

Although not felt by everone, Wanda's powrful jargon sent seismic shock waves through some of the more geologically unstable department in the organization.

Fred's new phone plan included unlimited Dada.

"My nephew Jack here can say ‘I’m unemployed’ in seven languages."

His Hers Pers Vis Xyrs Hirs TBD

"I was downgraded to junk status at work today."

"What did you think of the encryption article?"

'In today's market hyperbole was up sharply. Similes and metaphors held relatively steady with euphemisms hitting another record low.'

A man looking into a mirror saying "HA!"; his reflection looking back at him from the mirror is saying "!AH".

Wordplay: Nonstarter.

"The trouble with spelling rules is that they impede creativity."

Supermarket: Leafs, Rail Leafs

"I'm afraid that due to a recent reorientation of forward facing customer resource functionality you're going to have to make the complaint to yourself... in triplicate."

Communication Breakdowns

Holy Mackerel

'Once a donzel, the dyvour now settled for orts.'

"Spring Chicken"

Time Table

"He's a fine talker, but can you understand Portuguese?"

Traffic Jam

"I lost the spelling bee on the word 'gangsta.' "

"Turn to page 12 for our non-binary singalong."

I'm sorry, but your drug screen results disqualify you as an employment candidate, You see, sample 'A' is a normal brain, sample 'B' is a normal brain on drugs, and sample 'C',,, Well, Mr, Dumpty, sample 'C' is your brain,

'Let me put this in dog terms: Woof! Woof! Bark! Bark! Bow-wow-wow!'