Linguistic Juggler T-Shirts

'Legal says we could get by with the term 'super' but adding 'duper' might be pushing it.'

"I appreciate you keeping up with the vernacular of the times, but please refrain from referring to the billion-dollar restructuring as 'The Dealio'."

"Hungry" isn't a strong enough word for what I am. I'm … "hawngreh"! "Fascinated" isn't a strong enough word for what I am upon hearing that. I'm … "enthralled"!

Thrift: Try talking without vowels

'Still got the Llanwilgochphwelligogophewelli round, then, Fred?

'Ankee-yay o-gay ome-hay!'

"Remember the golden rule: more buzzwords, less real words."

Surgeon finds a doohickey on the patient's thingamabob.

"We need a best practice swim lane to leverage our core competency, move the needle outside the box, and open the kimono while keeping our ducks in a row. Can anyone give me a sustainable solution to more vertical effectiveness without getting too granula

"We have an acronym!"

A Bloody Butcher

"It's a new target to target a time to reduce targets so that we'll be less target driven!"

To do before Saturday...

"I never accomplish the impossible, if I did it would become an expectation."

Wordplay: In The Bag.

Introducing...Anagraman.

"It's time to retire the word 'profit'."

'Excellent!...We've been looking to hire someone who can think outside the box.'

'Technically, I was making fun of your writing ability.'

'Would everyone please phrase their questions in ones and zeros please.'

'A High-pain job? Yes, I believe we have that.'

"...our Annual Report has been criticised for lack of clarity - well done!"

"Hi, you've reached Susan's desk. I am monotasking right now, so I'll call you back it's the phone's turn again. Beep!"

"I was downgraded to junk status at work today."

'It's easy, Greg. Just get in touch with your inner regional sales manager.'

"It's a swearbox."

"There's a conversation to be had around a piece of work I'd like us to do tonight."

'Sorry to interrupt Dixon - but this is not what I meant when I said this company needed more blue-sky thinking!'

"My nephew Jack here can say ‘I’m unemployed’ in seven languages."

A man looking into a mirror saying "HA!"; his reflection looking back at him from the mirror is saying "!AH".

"We're to stop talking about 'budget cuts'. Apparently it's depressing for staff and clients..."

"So, do you see yourself as a car valet who writes screenplays or a screen writer who parks cars?"

"I do like you, Peter, but interfacing is a very serious step."

"Abbreviations here, abbreviations there, and one is more incomprehensible than the next!"

"We were looking for somebody with experience in mumbo-jumbo but your resume is mainly about gobbledegook."