Line Magician T-Shirts

Instructional guide to scribbling

"Bert, I'm confused. What happens after we circle the wagons, tighten our belts and walk a mile in our customer's shoes? Is that when the chickens come home to roost?"

'How fast can you hype?'

'First you forget logarithms. Then you forget how to do long division. Then the multiplication table begins to go...'

"May I put you on hold? I was on another line."

"And now, a little theorem for all you lovers out there."

Businessman with in and out boxes marked: 'Hocus' and 'Pocus'

'Pass it to Dewey! He's got himself into some kind of rhythm!!'

'The path to becoming an astronaut is rougher than I thought.'

"Now this chart should clear up any confusion you have with the report."

Smoke and mirrors.

'Brilliant, Prof.Brainstorm. Any fool can come up with a new product, you've come up with a new tax break.'

"Well, you say it's wrong, but it could be correct in an alternative universe."

"Well, I'm studying mathematics and I'm sure that's tougher than math."

"Maths is easy because it's so logical. 2 + 2 obviously equals 22."

'Eureka! After months of research and formulating algorithms, I've done it... I've discovered the secret to 'being cool'!'

The Forever Stamp

'My mother says I have a vivid imagination.'

Inkwell Genie.

Sister to brother: 'It's kind of like alphabet soup, only for numbers crunchers.'

Professor of Fuzzy Logic.

'Gifted class, indeed. One is gifted in science, but he can't read - one is gifted in reading, but won't even try math...'

'Let's see if we could put a spin on it and get the public interested.'

"11th Grade Math for Nincompoops"

'Everyone's using your theorem, Pythagoras. I told you you should have patented it.'

Professor Swizzlestix explains his point....

'What it all means is, ker-booom!'

Product Formula - "He's brilliant. But his mind wanders."

"Music helps with maths... like which song got to number one... which song got to number two..."

A2+B2=C2, 'Are you sure you're not just making this stuff up?'

"And when conventional theories don't work, we've got Charnier here to do us a spot of voodoo marketing."