Lifestyle Mavens Pillows

'Our lifestyle is watching lifestyle TV.'

'Someone got me because I matched her purse, I've been to a rock concert, a night club and two weddings, Life as a designer dog is great but I'd trade caviar for kibble to get a good night's sleep,'

Sometimes he just stood back and admired the breathtaking scenery of his life.

'No, honestly, it's just diet and exercise.'

Low-Energy Drinks

'I love my new easylife artist's easel.'

Cat in a flap

Meanwhile in Hollywood

"What do you mean 'sitting is the new smoking'? I thought fat was the new smoking?"

"When you've lost fifteen pounds...that's when the refrigerator gets returned!"

"I'm prescribing a mild sedative. Go wine shopping and get yourself a nice Chablis."

"I didn't say my prayers, but I e-mailed God earlier."

"Your blood sugar levels are off the chart! Just how many Hallmark Christmas movies did you watch?"

Trust

'No, you won't live longer if you give up sex and alcohol. But it'll seem like it.'

''I'm totally committed to simplifying my life. No more shitake jalapeno pesto.'

"I tried the C25k but prefer the 5k2C"

'Home is where I hang my bat.'

"I live for the moment. That moment just happens to be in the indefinite future."

'I think my diet is finally working. went form a large to an extra medium.'

'You see, you don't really need a cigarette to wake up in the morning.'

'No-one buys these stylish frames for their eyes, usually it's for their Facebook photo's.'

'Therapy in L.A.'

"Bob choked on a spoon of caviar while he was on skiing vacation in St. Moritz."

"Your mascara is running."

'It's not my fault that I've developed habits that cannot be sustained.'

'... So I said to Dave; 'You're not going to wear that baggy old thing are you?' But, he decided to come nude anyway.'

Macho Vegetarian

'No, Father, they're not praying. They're texting.'

Does it spark joy?

Life coach faces the Grim Reaper

"This area is popular with would-be actresses and models,we call it 'Silicon Implants'."

"it's just... we're too lazy to have any of our own."

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Obese beer drinkers.