Lifestyle Exploration Gifts

Tonight's topic. Lifestyle: Being your best self. We don't actually have a "lifestyle" -- we just wing it.

Business men: 'I try to live each day as if it's my last.'

'Someone got me because I matched her purse, I've been to a rock concert, a night club and two weddings, Life as a designer dog is great but I'd trade caviar for kibble to get a good night's sleep,'

Sometimes he just stood back and admired the breathtaking scenery of his life.

'No, honestly, it's just diet and exercise.'

Low-Energy Drinks

'I love my new easylife artist's easel.'

Cat in a flap

"When you've lost fifteen pounds...that's when the refrigerator gets returned!"

Meanwhile in Hollywood

"What do you mean 'sitting is the new smoking'? I thought fat was the new smoking?"

"Faster! Middle age is gaining on you!"

"Your blood sugar levels are off the chart! Just how many Hallmark Christmas movies did you watch?"

Trust

''I'm totally committed to simplifying my life. No more shitake jalapeno pesto.'

'No, you won't live longer if you give up sex and alcohol. But it'll seem like it.'

"I tried the C25k but prefer the 5k2C"

'Home is where I hang my bat.'

'Make it a microbrew, Jake! I've gone organic!'

"I live for the moment. That moment just happens to be in the indefinite future."

'I think my diet is finally working. went form a large to an extra medium.'

"Bob choked on a spoon of caviar while he was on skiing vacation in St. Moritz."

"Who's been nibbling at my kale house?"

"If he didn't live each day like it was his last, he would have lived another 40 years."

'... So I said to Dave; 'You're not going to wear that baggy old thing are you?' But, he decided to come nude anyway.'

'It's not my fault that I've developed habits that cannot be sustained.'

'I have one last question: this beach is clothing optional, right?'

'You see, you don't really need a cigarette to wake up in the morning.'

Macho Vegetarian

'No, Father, they're not praying. They're texting.'

Does it spark joy?

"it's just... we're too lazy to have any of our own."

Life coach faces the Grim Reaper

Investment Guru/Lifestyle Guru/Tech Guru/Fashion Guru

Obese beer drinkers.