License Seeker Pillows

'Maybe you weren't meant to teach.'

'I need both hands for steering.'

"Don't cry this time, it is off putting."

"Hue More Church Candlelight mass 7:00pm - 8:00pm"

'Going...Going...Gone! Sold to the lady with more money than sense.'

"If it doesn't happen on Facebook, it didn't happen."

I put a picture of my lunch on Facebook, and nobody hit "like." Who doesn't like Slim Jims and beer?

Critisize your weight.

"Business is booming! Come in and see our explosive sales today!"

Courage. Love.

"Good evening, sir, may I see your drinking licence please?"

Please stand by...I have temporarily lost my reason.

'The penguin is upset...'

Before and After Thomas Edison

'Should I try a three point turn?' - 'Better not, we only have 30 minutes left.'

Irregulars

"The boss loves the positive feedback he gets every time he says something."

I'm just saying, maybe you should try getting out of the city, Mr. Van Gogh. The Smoggy Night.

I'm ego surfing right now, looking up my name on different search engines.

'Lucas A Non Lucendo.'

'I need my lifestyle validated.'

That's a street lamp, Steve.

Control in the workplace.

Institute of Solid Geometry/Institute of Plane Geometry.

'And I have an overwhelming desire to be needed...'

"He who controls the Internet controls the world."

Policeman to driver; 'You gotta be kidding. Your name is actually Anna Nicole Smith?'

I brake for all 50 off Sales.

"Says here underage kids can get a hardship license if they have a legitimate reason to drive a car."

The corner that Spring's around

The last person to leave, please turn off the enlightenment.

"It's an old photo."

Lighthouse has energy efficient bulb.

'I need my lifestyle validated.'

Emerging from darkness to light