Lexical Warrior Pillows

'Poinsetta! ' 'Poinsettia!' 'Poinsetta! ' 'Poinsettia!'

Ban on Free Speech

"I had all the right answers, but I had them in the wrong order."

"The Langmore Regional High School Inner Debate Team"

Soldier armed with a pen.

"This is a test. This is only a test. IF this had been the real world it'd be your job you'd be fighting for, not a letter of the alphabet."

"Hurry up with that dictionary!"

The Physiciatrist...

"I wish we were just called T-Rex..."

"If you want to make a difference, become a mathematician."

The Freedom of the Press is Worth Fighting For!

Best Seller

Chicken soup for the adjunct professors soul

"An excellent defense. Let's give her the doctorate."

Decapitated coffee.

“Oi! This is a no fly zone!”

"Ain't isn't a word, and you know it."

'It feels like I'm very much in a good place these days. That is, aside from the grammar.'

'Hot' and 'dog' t-shirts.

"I'll start thinking outside the box when the box is empty."

"I''' have the misspelled 'Ceasar' salad and the improperly hyphenated veal osso-buco."

Professor McWit, Didn't Publish, So Perished.

"I fixed your leaky tap and the oven door... but there's nothing I can do with that dodgy seal on the fridge!"

Shakespeare in the clink

'Coleridge'

"Why... are there so many people who never eat pork? Because we have some excellent PR people working on our behalf."

'What makes me mad, I was only a couple seats away from all the right answers!'

Examiners.

"Ted doesn't test well."

Too much homework: kid with two backpacks.

'Just tell him two quarts of milk and a pint of cream, Will- it doesn't have to be a sonnet.'