Letter Spacing Buff T-Shirts

As Marjorie reached for the door, she hoped this was just a case of poor letter spacing.

"Yes. I said 2 by 2, but you needed to use 2 by 4s for the Ark...begin again."

TSA Noah

"Your soup is delicious. The broth perfectly compliments the font."

"Today, I'll be cherry-picking from Deuteronomy."

"Walking erect is very trendy now."

Men's fragrances...

'This is a nice car Mr...did you have it from new?'

"Believe me it's only an apple."

Bessy had won the 100m sprint... but many suspected Steeroid abuse!

'...and, of course you get a company car.'

"Everybody on the bus today was played by Anthony Hopkins."

'Moses parted the water so the Isrealites could go across? You mean in the mud?'

"Build it 300 cubits long? I thought you said centimetres!"

"But Mom, how can it be a vacation when you're taking me to school?"

'Not only will you know everything but I'll see that you get your own talk show.'

Adam and Eve, as old people.

"Oh sorry, those are the Ten Commandments. Hang on, I'll get you a menu."

'Don't you think they'd be better off in the water?'

Jesus plays peek-a-boo with doubting Thomas.

'Moses looks back - 'The commandments, the Red Sea, the books of the bible, but I never had a hit song.'

"I'm glad I don't have to put gas in it. the downside is that it takes a lot of time to put 3,000 AA batteries in it."

'What about three-day Sabbaths?'

'I think we're going to need an ANNOTATED edition.'

'It's the cows. They can't get past a cattle guard.'

"It doesn't say, son, who they pawned the kittens off on after the flood."

Happy Tots Day Care.

'...and then the bad woman gave the snake the apple, and that's when our problems began.'

Information Tightrope.

"I'm thinking of giving up yoga! Yesterday my lotus position turned into a cauliflower!"

Moses as a mobster.

Horseshoes...Samson-style

"It's Eden. You don't have to keep checking for ticks."

"But, Mom, how can it be a vacation when you're taking me to school?"

'If you plan to run a half-marathon you won't want a stopwatch, you'll need a calendar!'