Legend Appreciator Pillows

'Whoever wants my job must lift the sword from the stone.'

Sometimes he just stood back and admired the breathtaking scenery of his life.

Knight ponders on how to remove sword from the stone. Peasant onlooker says: 'You wanna get some WD-40 on that, mate.'

Pandora's Change Purse...

"The keep saying unrestored and what a nice PATINA, Ted. A better-sounding word for old tarnished stuff would be SCRINCH or SKRITCH, don't you think, eh, Ted?"

"If you need anything in the building, just call the super. This is the only known photo of him."

Scot holding a heart.

Einstein's T-Shirt Reads: I'm with Stupid (Arrows point everywhere).

Demon family vacations - Kid covering other's horns.

"Don't you sometimes worry that if they do give us our stuff back we'll lose some of the sense of grievance that's so crucial to our cultural identity?"

The Stat-ewe of Liberty.

Despite some initial reservations, the knights were often grateful for Guinevere's presence at the Round Table.

"Your antique gold watch didn't float."

Baby car seat for a Native American.

Mt. Tushmore

"I knew you was mad when you tried to sell me to them "American Pickers" fellers."

"Good night, Al. We still haven't found it."

'Forget it, Sister, Jessica -- Notre Dame doesn't need cheerleaders!'

"Careful now. It's fragile."

"So that's Ireland."

"You know, Daddy... We should thank a vet every day."

Life is just four letters...

"I'll be grateful for the small things, and you can be grateful for the big things - that way, we'll have it covered."

The Wellington Statue.

Painting the Sistine Chapel. 1508. 1509. 1510. 1511. 1512. It looks great, Michelangelo, but there's one thing I don't understand. Why didn't you just paint it in the regular way and then mount it on the ceiling?

'It isn't polite to point.'

"It's about this Hans Brinker boy. Either you stop him or he stands to lose a finger!"

'I'm very proud of what he achieved during his life.'

Michelangelo's David

"I don't know who on Facebook told you, but I can assure you Stradivarius didn't make accordions!"

"At the 2008 Olympics, Henry Cejudo became the youngest American to win a wrestling gold medal. His mother taught him that desire can trump despair. And then she taught him how to escape her chicken-wing armlock."

"Have you got it in beige?"

'Nostalgia just isn't what it used to be...'

"And if you press that one, someone will come in and tell you what a good job you're doing,"

"The money's not all that flash here, but you do get recognition for good work."