Legal Battles Pillows

"This firm has a long history of bringing gravitas to frivolous lawsuits."

'Hell hath no furry like the lawyer of a woman scorned.'

'You won't be able to afford a top lawyer like me for very long. But, maybe just long enough to give your wife one heck of a scare.'

'Any chance of us winning?' - 'I'm determined to fight this case down to your last penny.'

'Call me immediately if there's any serious side effects so I can notify my lawyer.'

The New Fundamentals of Art: 'We'll begin with the most basic figure, the trademark attorney...'

Wal-Mart Ruling

'This prediction has a margin of error of plus or minus fifteen...fifteen class-action suits brought against the company.'

"Bob & Sue 2011" "Sued Bob 2011"

Lawyer to bad hair lady: 'It's difficult to establish pain and suffering based on a bad hair day.'

"The doctor is in court on Tuesdays and Wednesdays."

"The jury didn't buy my defense that CEOs just want to have fun."

"The last time I was in Europe was 4 boyfriends ago..."

India Decriminalizes Homosexuality

"Another slander suit!"

"And finally, I implore the jury not to take my clients lack of alibi and blatant lies out of context."

'Your honor, I'd like a short recess so my client can make a run for it.'

"Does it hurt when my attorney does this?"

"There's no need for your kitty to be envious. After state and federal taxes and legal administrative fees, Chessy's share of Aunt Martha's estate came to hardly anything."

'He started it!'

'Let's see what the employment tribunal has to say about that, shall we?'

'Is that guy back again? Hey, if you find that sponge I lost, give a shout.'

'Furthermore, had a handrail been fitted to the wall , my client would not be sitting here now.'

"The law is an ass...employment law, however, is an asset."

Honour Being Served 'Apps at Dawn'.

'That's nothing...I've been told my wig takes fifteen years off me.'

'It's my mother. She wants to talk to you.'

"My wife's lawyer doesn't understand me."

'Insofar as all parties have agreed to mediation, I've taken the liberty of hiring a medium.'

"Excellent! It's the disclosure documents for your hearing on Monday."

"She left everything to you. But, the hamster is contesting the will."

'Yuo were wise to get a second opinion. Now we can sue both doctors.'

"Thank you, Nathaniel. I think you, too, are a very scary young lawyer."

Keystone XL

"I forget. If I have an adverse reaction, do I call my doctor or my lawyer?"