Learning Life Lessons Gifts

"Your momma lied to you, boy."

'It's time you learned, son - in-laws and outlaws aren't necessarily opposites.'

No one has ever been accused of choosing bad relatives.

"I throw this ball, you go get it and bring it back — everything else will fall into place."

"Ma, what does 'kosher' mean?"

"Winning isn't everything, Josh. Not being the reason your team loses is everything."

"Son, the world is full of disappointments. About 7.7 billion of them."

"Better luck next time, kid."

"I learned one thing today. Attitude trumps aptitude!"

"A man never stands so tall, son, as when he stoops to pick up a quarter."

"Well, I'm just saying, buying me a cheap used car for graduation is not going to teach me responsibility."

'Take a good look, Junior. When I was your age, I was 'Fun Size,' too.'

'I'm sorry Timmy, but if I keep going for help, you'll never learn to take care of yourself,'

'Remember, son, don't believe any thing you hear and only half of what you see.'

" It was a jungle out there, but I quite liked it."

"Do you know the biggest thing I've learned in my thirty nine years?"

"Failure is definitely the best teacher, but I'm thinking auditing a class with Success might not hurt."

Ready for the curves life throws at you.

"In this life son, if you want something, you have to hunt for it."

A good executive is known by the company he keeps solvent.

"Baldo, credit cards are a terrible idea! Take it from someone who has 10 of 'em."

'What did you learn at university today?'

"We all make mistakes. That's why pencils have erasers!"

Be prepared - Don't jump to confusion.

'Remember, Junior, if at first you don't succeed...come up with a good exit strategy.'

"Does school really help people with real life?"

Smart people learn from experience - other peoples'.

"Don't think of it as being grounded. Think of it as suffering the consequences of your monumental stupidity."

'It's just that simple. So act now and start barking up the 'right' tree.'

"What is this telling us? Amateurs built the Ark. Professionals built the Titanic."

He who hesitates is five miles past his exit.

If there's one thing I've learned, it's this: Never trust someone who tries to sell you nine life insurance policies.

People with anything valuable to say rarely become orators.

'False alarm! I'm back. It was only a career suicide.'

'My parents are trying to wean me off instant gratification.'