Learning And Development Specialist Gifts

Keys to Success: Focus, Alertness, Concentration...

'The wheel was great, but what have you done for me lately?'

'As a beginning teacher, you know you come here prepared to teach and become a good teacher. As you gain experience, you will learn that you also come here to care and become a great teacher.'

"I suppose just climbing the greasy pole is no longer an option..."

USAID Octopus Wrapping Around Globe

"Remember Mr. Cockbundle is not just a 'customer', he is an important source of valuable and readily marketable data."

'You did turn the company around... but we liked it the way it was...'

Children's education

'We've cut and pasted your list into 84 arbitrary sub-lists. Well, our work here is done.'

"He talks the talk."

Speed of assimilation VS New team members

'We need a product line that will stimulate our profit line.'

Baby's First Words... Hi Guys!

'Okay, the motorized rocking chair could use an emergency off switch.'

'He's my personal potty trainer.'

"They grow up so quickly. It seems like only yesterday that he was in the third grade. Wait, it was yesterday!"

'Dad, can you teach me to swim?' 'Well, I'm not much of a swimmer, but I can teach you to tread water. I do that every day at work.'

'It was accidentally reversed one day and our profits immediately skyrocketed.'

'Obviously, I know a lot of weasel words, so I would be great in a business development role...'

"How learning curves feel... Before: Holy hell During: I'm not gonna make it! After: That wasn't so bad! The next time: Again?!!"

"He's so well behaved I'm really worried, doctor."

"I was just like you, then I hired a life coach. Now look at me!"

Cut-Rate Think Tanks - Now available for hire.

'This sugar substitute is perfect except for one thing. It's salty.'

Child Development: 'He's developing just fine, those babies in the commercials aren't really talking.'

'You expect me to play with educational toys during SUMMER VACATION?'

'I've been learning a lot, but I do terribly on tests.'

'Would you like me to have a word with educational psychologist about Julie?'

"You know what I wish? I wish you folks in Research and Development, JUST ONCE, would bring out a new product without completely reinventing the wheel!"

R and D for a Pharmaceutical company

'I wouldn't worry. At that age they put everything in their mouths.'

'Soon he will stop asking where he came from and start telling you where he is going.'

Cereal Development Dept...'Johnston! I don't think whistle, humm, and detonate is going to catch on at breakfast.'

"He's very smart. We just need to work on his focus."

'He likes to introduce variety to his mentoring communications...'