Learner Of Life Gifts

Adult Courses. It's so hard keeping the information from different classes separate! I'm talking film history and psychology. I failed a test because I said a "psychopath" is the walkway Norman Bates took home. I also confused geography and aeronautics. I said the "great plains" are located at an Air Force testing base in the California desert. My worst nightmare was confusing the thinks ti learned in driver's education and statistics. But at least I now know it's driving where you must st

"There's something weird about Emily. She actually likes school!"

'X is unknown? Even to somebody with all your education?'

"Oh indeed I did: I went feral for a year when I was young. It taught me a lot about the world, but about myself too..."

"Your momma lied to you, boy."

"Winning isn't everything, Josh. Not being the reason your team loses is everything."

"Always take the bull firmly by the tail and look him directly in the eye..."

"If you do well in your first practicum, you can move on to teaching real children."

'Take a good look, Junior. When I was your age, I was 'Fun Size,' too.'

"A man never stands so tall, son, as when he stoops to pick up a quarter."

Teacher has two boxes: "Book Smart" and "Street Smart"

"If animals can be cloned, why can't homework be cloned?"

Lion Tamers School - Lion licking his lips examiner marking a fail

'I'm sorry Timmy, but if I keep going for help, you'll never learn to take care of yourself,'

'There's one app we can't give you ... aptitude.'

'It's time you learned, son - in-laws and outlaws aren't necessarily opposites.'

"I'm doing all I can to make the little things count."

"In this life son, if you want something, you have to hunt for it."

'OK Sheldon - which part of the Unified Field Theory do you not understand?'

"Failure is definitely the best teacher, but I'm thinking auditing a class with Success might not hurt."

University of Hard Knocks

A good executive is known by the company he keeps solvent.

"We all make mistakes. That's why pencils have erasers!"

Moral Values for Dummies

"I want to be a Jockey."

'What did you learn at university today?'

Be prepared - Don't jump to confusion.

'Remember, Junior, if at first you don't succeed...come up with a good exit strategy.'

"I'm just saying you're not allowed to use your phone during class. You're not being de-platformed."

"Does school really help people with real life?"

Smart people learn from experience - other peoples'.

'How come you're always trying to teach me things I don't want to know.'

'False alarm! I'm back. It was only a career suicide.'

'So, just how long were you at the School of Hard Knocks?'

"Don't think of it as being grounded. Think of it as suffering the consequences of your monumental stupidity."