Leadership Leaner Gifts

"You'll be familiar with Belbin and his work on 'Structure an roles' within teams."

"If we can just get beyond this 'I'm the boss' mentality and concentrate on a simple 'What I say goes' outlook, I think this will all work out."

A disgruntled employee chain-sawes hois boss's desk in two.Boss says:'Alright Smith, I'll stop referring to the employees as 'oopsy daisies'.'

"But can't I be feared and loved?"

Changing Minds

"Take us to your inclusive leader."

"The GOOD news is that 94 people want to attend the leadership training, the bad news is that 64 of them want to change the venue, 56 the time and 45 want to be course leader."

Stand-up comic/ceo: 'A funny thing happened on the way to the board meeting...'

Mr. Blok goes bowling.

"This may seem counter intuitive, but maybe the solution is to lighten up."

'Ah, Reeves - it's lonely on top!'

"It's lonely here at the top. Thank goodness I've never been a people person."

No need for you to read this. You seem to have got it to a fine art.

'I'm looking for someone to keep the blood off my hands.'

'Would everyone please join hands for a moment? I'd like to try jump-starting this meeting!'

It wasn't easy, but we finally plugged the hole.

'As a boss you'll find me hard, but fair. Actually, that's only half true.'

'Here's your report card... I mean, review.'

Lance, I know I'm lying down on the job, but

Business head.

'Welcome to our first ever... Casual Sunday.'

"Oh, I'm sorry, Berger. I must have accidentally pressed the 'Sycophant' button."

Hell, yes, it's lonely at the top. Plus I get nosebleeds.

"The company apparently lacks LEADERSHIP. We need to think about the possibility of setting up a policy group...."

'I said, I think I know whey you're finding it lonely at the top.'

Why as a general rule Pastors are not allowed to help on building work days.

"Your performance review will be done with the help of a co-host to lighten the mood a little."

Donald Trump

"Take us to your bathroom."

"I'm a type B personality in a type A large business."

"We're just like one big happy family here."

"That's a truly fine gesture - putting up that sign for Trudeau - Mr. Poilievre!" "It's for Carney." "Goodbye, Prime Minister!"

"Does anyone know where the Leadership class is?"

"Our executive search committee got lost!"

'Don't tell me I've forgotten it's Causal Friday..?'