Law Enforcement Joke Fan Prints

"I realise that you're trying to impress your new employers on your first day, dear. But, this is our car!"

Police Feline Unit

Billy. The Kid.

"This is a neighbourhood vigilante area."

"Good evening, sir, may I see your drinking licence please?"

"He's an ex-police dog, so he's very law abiding."

"If we could explain it in Hip-hop, officer?. . . It would be like this!"

"You have to let me make my own mistakes."

'We've got a new DNA database...'

'Looks like the latest crime figures have been stolen.'

"You were going 24,998 in a 24,955!"

"Ahhh! Ha-ha! Exactly what I said when I was pulled over. Dipstick!"

"The big one dropped his weapon, but keep an eye on the little one. I think he's still armed."

Traffic Jam

"Just put one foot directly in front of the other, sir, and walk in as straight a line as possible."

Sweet Jailbreak

For the last time, officer, I'm absolutely, positively sure it was number four.

'Pull it over, Speedy.'

Stun-gun target practice.

'Let this guy go. He's working under cover.'

One lobster has another in hand cuffs.

"Honey, did you have to bring the whole squad to our elopement?"

Rollercoaster police chase.

"Next time the killer comes on your radio do not say 'COPY THAT'."

'Have you any idea what speed you were doing, sir?'

Piñata police line-up.

'...if you don't stop..er..singing Mr Bieber I'll arrest you for possessing an offensive weapon as well as drunk driving.'

'Donut shop is down the hall to your right - and I'm not answering any more questions without my lawyer present.'

'I'm sure the officer will understand why I'm not stopping.'

'This is just a routine check, sir -- are you a turtle?'

Police Picket Line - Do Not Cross.

'He arrested two kids yesterday. One for drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks. He charged one and let the other off!'

"Victor one to control...we want to report a stolen car, Sergent - A white saloon with a little blue flashing light on top..."

Oh, sorry, I didn

It slowly became apparent that the police interpretive dance artist was less effective than the police sketch artist.