Language Translator Gifts

Even more of what people say (and what they really mean)

"On a more positive note the guidance we’ve published on the services we can’t provide is published in 37 different languages."

"And the last little piggy cried, 'Oui, oui, oui' all the way home."

Hey, calm down --- Now, what did you say again?

Solicitor speaks legal jargon and has a translator who tells client: 'You haven't a hope!'

"'I don't want war'. . . well, wither our translation program is broke or this president has a strange kind of humor!"

Campaign for Plain English

"You haven't got dyslexia- the instructions are in polish."

"You and your, 'why bother to learn another language. Everyone in the known universe speaks, Zarconian'!"

"If Google Translate is correct, they want our women and our cattle."

'Today the stock market was moribund, as growth equities sputtered and bonds dipped due to the inverted yield curve. I'd translate that into layman's terms...but they don't pay me enough.'

She - Interpreter - He.

"It lost a little something in translation."

Henry the amazing talking dog.

The Family Joules: Part 6

Alphabet soup gets cold for slow readers.

Revival Meeting - Simultaneous translation of all talking in tongues.

Archeologist Deciphers Limerick Heiroglyphs

We're going on a first date. So many words are misused every day. Literally! I don't accept the use of imperfect language. Me either. Trying to fight it has no effect. It's all a mute point. Irregardless, I could care less. I had nothing farther to say.

"Today I came across antiderenuclearizationalityness."

"My nephew Jack here can say ‘I’m unemployed’ in seven languages."

"No, wait a minute. I'm King. You're Rex."

Jorge Luis Borges

"It's translated from French, so where it says 'Harvard Business School' it may mean 'jail.'"

Dept. for Obfuscation - Out for periodic diurnal replenishment of nutritive substances.

East End Maps.

Just our luck...old school crime translation classes!

"To hear the ocean in English, press one. Para Espanol ..."

'This is delicious. I'm glad I didn't try to order in Italian.'

'Should-do and shouldn't-do sound a lot alike.'

'You've previously worked as a hieroglyph translator and an MI5 codebreaker - ideal!'

"Baldo, Gracie...you need to learn more Spanish. For the rest of the week, I'm going to speak nothing but Spanish, and Tia Carmen will act as your interpreter, OK? Tienen tarea?"

'I need a text-mail interpreter.'

Proof Reading

Dictionary Sale - Now in High Definition.