Language Juggler Mugs

"I'm sorry – you have the wrong language."

"I can't go"

'Seven 'provided', thirteen 'buts' and twenty seven 'ifs' - this is the best stockmarket forecast to clients I've ever read.'

"He doesn't speak English. Act out for him that he should take 2 pills and 3 pills alternate days for nine days, and then he should come back here."

Learn to Speak: French, Spanish, HTML, CSS.

"The trouble with spelling rules is that they impede creativity."

"You're writing in the masculine again."

'Your wife didn't understand me either - until I started using spell check.'

"I saw a saw saw a see-saw."

"For years I've been baring my soul in here, and you've hardly said a word."

Mange tout or man get out

"I was downgraded to junk status at work today."

Wordplay: Trash

'I used all the right words to describe my employee...but not necessarily in the right order.'

'I plan to hyphenate my name when I marry. But eventually I'd like to upgrade to a semicolon followed by a lightning bolt.'

'What do you call a person who steals identities?', 'An 'yclept-o-maniac.''

Translator

'Hurry, hurry! What's he saying?'

'Grumphie and frijol yields an unpleasant aubade.'

Dyslexia clinic with a signa: Out Ot Hcnul

'Effin' English - that wasn't one of my best subjects either son.'

'Technically, I was making fun of your writing ability.'

'Let me put this in dog terms: Woof! Woof! Bark! Bark! Bow-wow-wow!'

"I don't want them overexcited,so we don't say T-R-E-A-T around Buddy or B-E-E-R around Bob."

"Remember the golden rule: more buzzwords, less real words."

Surgeon finds a doohickey on the patient's thingamabob.

"We need a best practice swim lane to leverage our core competency, move the needle outside the box, and open the kimono while keeping our ducks in a row. Can anyone give me a sustainable solution to more vertical effectiveness without getting too granula

"We have an acronym!"

"It's time to retire the word 'profit'."

"I never accomplish the impossible, if I did it would become an expectation."

Wordplay: In The Bag.

A Bloody Butcher

"It's a new target to target a time to reduce targets so that we'll be less target driven!"

'Excellent!...We've been looking to hire someone who can think outside the box.'

'Would everyone please phrase their questions in ones and zeros please.'