Lab Jokester T-Shirts

'Common cold? We thought you said 'caramel corn!''

'Maybe we have the wrong subject for this brain mapping project.'

"I thought he would run all sorts of scientific tests."

"Turns out I'm not the wise old paramecium I thought I was."

"These stem cells taste funny."

'Okay - who put my lunch through the mass spectrometer.'

The Evil Pixie of Reaction Mixtures Taunts Another Chemist.

Great progress has been made in the science of genetic clowning.

'You lacked the necessary maturity to see this project through ... NAH-NAH A YEAH YEAH!'

Conserve Energy Turn Off Atom Smasher When Not In Use.

Breakthrough by a comic

Laptop Dancing.

"I thought you wanted me to change."

'Hey, what happened to my cookies?'

'Seven layers in one dip? Gentlemen, what have we wrought?'

'Everybody on the internet now knows I'm a dog, so I'm pretending to be a cat.'

"I said to make a thousand CLONES."

'I wish they'd hurry up and fix the wind tunnel.'

Press Any Key. No, Not That One.

"Perkins! What have you gone and done now...??"

"I think you should hire me for my vast software knowledge. . . and then pay for me to go learn software."

'I think the computer has a crush on me. It asked me to remain after class.'

"Are you sure this is a 'Flu virus?" "See for yourself...it's nose is running!"

'One placebo or two, doctor?'

Biologists often consult with microbiologists.

'There must be some way we can capitalize on that damn boson.'

Physics Improv. "I now vill be taking suggestions from ze audience..."

Happy Bifurcation Day,

'You knew I was a mad scientist when you married me!'

'A little squirt like Graubart would theorize that the Universe is contracting!'

'Don't you hate it when they look BACK at you?'

'The problem seems to be in the memory bank.'

Bacterial Cultural Center

'Dude, that big creepy eye is back.'

'If you don't behave we'll unfreeze your stem cells!'