Kitsh Collector Prints

"Maybe we should cut back on those lawn catalogues."

"These are the very weapons your mother and I used in our famous duel."

"Don't worry about your purchase not working. Everything we sell here is totally non-functional."

'Will you lot come out! - the new kit's not that bad!'

"You don't think it's too ungapatchka?"

'It's genuine 17th century satsuma - and the pair would have been worth ?14,000.'

"So you kiss me and I turn into a prince? No thanks, sweetie, I'm gay. I'm already a queen."

'Heirloom Tiffany Lamp Delivery. I Brake for Everything.'

Out of kilter.

"My doctor said I'm not getting any younger. I'd like a second opinion."

His cubicle had come to be known as 'Teddy Bear Heaven'.

Sister Cities

'You must be awfully secure in your masculinity.'

The White House: Some Assembly Required.

"I'd say business was brisk."

'...So you claim this is genuine Rembrandt?'

'... Going once...going twice...aaaand--sold! To the gentleman in the front row for a thousand words.'

"You love anything tacky, don't you?"

"Twenty-five thousand, do I hear thirty thousand? Let me remind you all - this is the last Thin Mint cookie in the sleeve..."

"An overload -- even this is beginning to look like Kitsch."

"Fetch, Ernie, fetch!"

'I swapped shirts with Peter Crouch.'

"Hey, Dad, guess what? My Honus Wagner baseball card is worth $2.1 million!"

"I wonder what this was for."

"I'm sorry, I can't assist with this request."

These colour charts are ridiculous... coal' black, 'midnight' black, 'licquorice black'.' - 'There's too much choice! All I want is plain old boring bl-' - 'Ooooooh... 'panther' black.' -

"Don't put that on. You're wearing this shirt today."

"It's a flip phone. I guess we can document this as an ancient, archaeological discovery."

"Why are these things always such pathetic kitsch?"

'How old is this vase?'

Backdoor

'Of coure you're the only girl I've ever kissed,on a desert island,that is.'

"Hmm interesting Hallmark..."

'Your entire library consists of nothing but tabloids bound in Corinthian leather?'

"I never expected you to pay through the nose."