Kitchen Organization Gifts

"I freeze all my leftovers until I feel less guilty about throwing them away."

'The vegetables sat in the crisper for hours...days...a whole week. Then suddenly, the drawer opened. A hand reached in, grabbed the kale, and all you could hear was the sound of...A Garbage disposal.'

"I always knew I could look behind the fridge, but I never stopped to ask if I should."

'Don't look at me. I'm not the one who puts the measuring cups where I can't reach them.'

'Cleaning the fridge weekly instead of monthly is a very good idea.'

Food Waste

Ever wonder why we debated what color fridge to buy?

'My marriage ain't gonna work, Bill - the wife stores mugs upside-down instead of right way up.'

Heartache in the refridgerator.

VARIOUS ITEMS OF LABELLED KITCHENWARE.

Cookery Lesson.

Mankind's earliest ancestor emerges from the primordial ooze, closely followed by a prehistoric species of re-sealable plastic containers.

Flour, sugar, earth, air, fire, water.

'When you've finished the washing up and you're certain you've cleaned absolutely everything... you'll always find another teaspoon.'

'I asked you to clean the fridge, not declutter it.'

"I hate going to the grocery store, so I bought a refrigerator that holds enough food for a year."

I've always wanted to quit while I was ahead but the opportunity never presented itself.

Where your mind & battle are los

Let's get organized

Counting ribs

'I'd say your caravan's a tad overloaded, sir.'

"It looks like our house got sick and threw up the attic."

A slice of bread walks a tightrope between slots on the toaster.

"That's it. We’re toast."

"The dryer giveth and the dryer taketh away."

Soup of the month.

"As you can see, I've alphabetized the items, presents owing if you will, so if you can digitally initial here, here, here, here and here and sign there. Thank you. See you December 24."

Frozen Turkey: "I hate to bother you on a holiday but I'm freezing out here. Do you have a heated enclosed space I could rest inside for four to five hours?"

Gay Times...

'Please put that confusing mess of documents, files and folders where it belongs...in your computer.'

"....Oh, and the dog's eaten all the fridge magnets."

"I'm busy this afternoon, but I can crayon you in for Saturday."

'I started out washing dishes, but when the dishwater tasted better than the soup...'

Good Luck!

Type A Freshman - changed courses four times, got a job, organized a protest, quit the job, plans to take second semester abroad.