Kitchen Novice T-Shirts

'What do you mean, you can't cook either?'

'So this is a kitchen!'

"This is actually quite good. Remember the first time you tried to order pizza?"

'We haven't started to learn to cook, we're still learning to thaw...'

"It's the first time I've cooked Christmas dinner.. so I'm doing a salad."

'Making your own tea? Good effort but next time let's heat the water...'

Sick wife teaches husband to use can-opener

'I hope it's okay -- the cookbook had some really confusing abbreviations.'

"I was with you right up to the cumin."

"Can I borrow the car keys?"

Lady using paint roller as rolling pin for baking dough.

'Still not ready to talk? Ok dip him again.'

Two books: 'The Joy of Cooking' next to 'The Joy of Dieting'.

Happy Knife, Happy Wife

'I ran out of sugar, so I used salt.'

"Compliments to the chef! Pass it on."

'Life is all attitude: 45 seconds of enjoying it...45,000 hours of regretting it...'

Too much cilantro

A Day In The Kitchen

"An untested recipe. An uncalibrated oven. Substituted ingredients. And yet, the cake...the cake is...magnificent!"

'Note to self: Like coffee, homemade coffee wine should be available in decaf, too.'

"Our cook is new, so ge's Googling what goes on a bacon, lettuce and tomato sandwich as we speak."

"I've combined a laxative and alphabet soup. I call it 'Letter Rip!'"

'As a surprise I thought I'd give the new cookbook a try tonight.'

Lockdown casserole

"Oh we're fine, my husbands just learning to cook during the quarantine."

Making healthy substitutions at mealtime

'Preparing rocket salad isn't domestic science, ladies.'

"I don’t know, Margaret. She looks like the type who makes exotic stuffings."

'Mom! Dad's eating my science fair project!'

"This controls the speed, this opens the door and if you press the red button a maintenance man appears and gives you a very large bill"

The Inexperienced Cook

Tzatzikicicle

Culinary surgery.

'We call it the 'Tomato Surprise' because the chef tinkered with the DNA a little.'