Kitchen Decoration T-Shirts

"I call it 'Organised Cabinet Number One'."

'OK, who's rotting?'

Joey discovers the difference between coffee beans and jelly beans.

"Ironically, this is the living room."

"I spilled a red dot of paint, so I painted the whole room so you wouldn't notice it."

“She’s in her abstract expressionism phase.”

Cocktails on the verandah.

'We had the baby's ultrasound photo made into wallpaper.'

"Maybe we should cut back on those lawn catalogues."

Santa Claus's Mail

'Fine stencilling. But have you never thought - Tit Willow, Tit Willow, Tit Willow?'

'Make sure you pretend to water it.'

"Did you sleep awkwardly again?"

"Don't worry about your purchase not working. Everything we sell here is totally non-functional."

A slice of bread walks a tightrope between slots on the toaster.

'You say 'dead.' I say 'low maintenance.''

"I thought we agreed you weren't going to work at home."

Dog Hunting Trophies.

"This is going to make the most amazing driftwood table."

Maybe I should have measured my garden before going shopping....

'Is that the only wallpaper you could find?!'

"That's it. We’re toast."

"All in favor of destroying the throw pillow, raise your paw."

"I decided to go all out on the house decorations this year."

Christmas Tree

'Santa recalled thousands of toys ― he delivered them to kids who're in fact naughty.'

"Cheery little flowers, saying good night, saying good morning!"

Soup of the month.

Adhesive Tiles: Do Not Open from this End.

Christmas tree with wadded up lights.

Second hand furniture.

Painting the Ceiling

Turd - 'It's one of a kind.'

Christmas in the Fish Bowl

"Make yourself comfortable on my new decorative throw rocks."