Kitchen Comedy Appreciator Gifts

'Let's face it Sharon, you only ever use the cooker to light your cigarettes!'

'Here you go, kid! A worm.'

'The iceman cometh too soon!'

Cow's Last Will and Testament.

"For the last time stupid, you're tin man, you are not by any leap of the imagination, anything like Iron Man!"

The Ferocious Viking Wiener Dog

'He went in for the Worst Singer and won first prize in the Gurning competition at the same time!'

'I believe we've located the cause of your back problem, Mrs. Kangaroo.'

Fly Fishing

Ten Plagues for Today's Seder

"....Oh, and the dog's eaten all the fridge magnets."

'I heard the Board was talking about kicking you, but I don't know if it's upstairs or out.'

Songs about Texas, next 1100 miles.

"Do you see that inexplicably beautiful hydrangea over there?… Nature calls."

'I asked Will if he wrote it. He said he wasn't sure.'

"Your MBA and PHD are impressive but what concerns me is your low number of Facebook friends."

"It's basically the 'Tragedy of King Lear' but with animated penguins."

'I suppose you want Polly to forget she heard that.'

"I just cleaned that glass! How can it already be covered in nose prints?!"

"Oh no! Oh no! Oh no! Oh no!"

Conservation Area

"Did you just do a rooster?"

"Waiter, there's a hare in my salad!"

"I pray that he will enjoy my pie..." "The smell's enough to make me cry!"

"It's our latest scent...Dryer Sheet."

All-Verbal Westerns

Moulin Rouge Security

Cook and her Maids

Golfer mistakes a hen's egg for his golf ball.

'Another blond hair! You've been making a lot of night calls lately...'

"A haand gel...!?"

"All stories have been told, all songs have been sung. But that won't stop us from making movie reboots."

'Dinner will be ready soon -- the submarine sandwiches are soaking now.'

"Play dead!" "What a long strange trip its been..."

Bessy had won the 100m sprint... but many suspected Steeroid abuse!