Kingdom Lover T-Shirts

"The knights of the round accent table"

'Don't look at me like that! You're the one who wanted to live in a bouncy castle!'

"He's his own worst enemy."

'The Burrito King.'

'How about a game of cards?'

Uses of a Dead Cat in History: Dead Cat Crown Jewels

'This vacation, let's go on something OTHER than a power trip.'

'You've made a powerful enemy'

"Messenger, dost thou bring me good news or dost thou bring me bad news?"

"With all due respect, Sire, the Pizza King sends his kindest regards."

'He followed me home, Dad -- can I oppress him?'

Medieval headlines.

"Today we're going to talk about lowering the drawbridge."

"What good is power if you don't use it?"

'It's not cheating...My king is Henry VIII.'

'I know you had to give him a job because he's a relative, but I still think a Press Secretary should know how to read and write.'

"Drop it... Such things banished in our kingdom."

"Oh, you don't need to fight them—you just need to convince the pitchfork people that the torch people want to take away their pitchforks."

"Your Majesty, this learned committee has done deep research on the subject, and we have come to one conclusion: queens often marry down."

'I seek an audience with the king.'

"Seems another philanthropist has beaten us here."

Queen

"Just suck it up and let him continue binge-watching your entire repertoire."

Young man, I think you are wearing my hat!

'Time gentlemen please. Come on, don't you have any kingdoms to go to? ! '

'How about a game of cards?'

'Kings can get away with anything!'

'Having a lot of underlings doesn't make you an overling!'

'It's not a crusade, you sillies! - I just want to maintain a PRESENCE in the Middle East.'

"But the people,Your Majesty! The people are not happy."

King glaring at a map labelled "Mine" and "Theirs"

'Yes, this is us speaking.'

"I shouldn't have replaced the alligators with bass."

'These bugs ion your hair are simply delicious! where id you pick them up at?'

'Massacre the dissidents, but avoid the appearance of wrongdoing.'