K9 Units Pillows

"I used to be a successful police drug dog, until I started snorting instead of sniffing."

"No no, I said sit!!"

Claus 2.0

"Meet the author"

'R2-D2 is not in. Please leave a message after the beep-wheep-zip-booop ...'

"Look what I found, dad!"

Ascent of Machine.

How we imagined A.I. in 1977. . . How it's looking today. . .

"This is probably not the time to admit I only joined the force because I figured we'd just be chasing cat burglars."

"Hey, remember a few days ago, when all this was unacceptable?"

"Oh boy! Mom made microchip cookies!"

"Jimmy, I want you to meet our new safety officer."

'Good news. We're not Daft Punk.'

The First Martian Dog.

Robocop and Juliet.

"But if you change your system preferences to match mine, is it really love?"

Robot Jogger

"The robots have become self-aware and self-loathing. Now all they do is write novels."

"Oh! It's you! I was expecting the machine."

"You'll do everything...accounting, marketing, manufacturing...with no pay or benefits...and three years from now we'll trade you in for a newer, sexier model."

',,,And we'd really like a heart for the Tin Man,,,'

Thank you to those who never came home and to those who never left their side.

That must be my computer date... (Answers door to robot).

'If I wasn't meant to destroy the world, God wouldn't have created me with atomic blasters instead of hands.'

"Behold! My greatest improvement to fatherhood. She cooks, cleans, takes care of the kids, burps, and farts. What's more...she self-identifies as a father!"

'Keep in mind, some assembly is required.'

"Shouldn't have, you really."

'Okay guys - lights out!'

'Why do they call these conventions when everyone here is so unconventional?'

Employee of the Month

Telephone message - 'This is a recording. If you'd like to speak to a real live human being, forgetaboutit.

King kong 5 G.

"Why are all of your answers so mechanical?"

Coffee Shop and Battery Charging Station

"You're hired!"