Jury Duty Veteran Pillows

"'If you can't say something nice, don't say it at all' doesn't work with a grand jury."

"Your Honor, we're going to go with the prosecution's spin."

"#notguilty."

"The president is awarding the Medal of Honor to 24 Army veterans...whose heroism and gallantry were overlooked because of their race or ethnicity."

"In closing, I would like to remind the jury that he says he didn't do it."

"The jury didn't buy my defense that CEOs just want to have fun."

"Am I going to get my just desserts?"

'Your honor, I'd like a short recess so my client can make a run for it.'

"Boy is he good! He's even got me convinced you're guilty!"

"Before the defense rests, my client would like to read you a little sonnet he composed about his love for the jury."

'Let's try it again. And this time, don't cross your fingers.'

'I got a suspended sentence.'

'He's a retired Drill-Sergeant!'

You've been found guilty by a jury of your peers -- You're toast fella!

'Then if there are no objections, we will recess until tomorrow morning.'

'At first it was a few dollars here and a few dollars there. Then I realized I'd have to pay my lawyer.'

"Ladies and Gentlemen of the jury, my client blah blah...."

"Not guilty, Your Honor, and thank you for asking."

'We find the defendant guilty. I mean, why else would he go out and hire the best lawyer in town?'

"We, the jury, award the plaintiffs 100 trillion dollars - just because."

A Lawyer's Closing Arguments Wins the Support of the Jury

'Is your verdict unanimous?'

'We find the defendant to be dead meat.'

Monument To The General/Soldier Monument

The evangelist turned lawyer's opening arguments were unconvincing

"We find the defendant 'guilty', …. not that there's anything wrong with that."

'It wasn't easy, but I got you a jury of your peers — six hairdressers, five interior decorators, and a professor of 18th Century poetry.'

"Your honor, we were having so much fun being sequestered, we forgot what the defendant is charged with."

Barrister pointing out dozing judge to the jury

"It's clear from the replay that it was a leading question."

'Slow down. . . okay. . . 'Do you solemnly swear to tell the whole truth and nothing but the truth, so help you god?''

Dog defendant and cat jury - The Rigged Jury

'We find the defendant guilty. Do you have a problem with that?'

'The jury have instructed me to say that they expected a rather more spicy case.'

'I'd better start on your appeal.'