Junk Enthusiast Pillows

Garage Sales

"One day at a time, Ethel, I take it one day at a time. So far this year, it has been the usual assortment of useless junk. Last week, he located a dump scow, and he spent all this week dragging a 1929 Ford engine block out of the river. . ."

'I gotta be honest with you. . . I wouldn't be in business if it weren't for smart folks like you who can't pass up a bargain on stuff they don't need.'

Antiques Roadkill.

'I've expanded.'

Al's Junk: Now selling Russian Govt. Bonds!

"It's Joe's junk yard. He wants to buy some air time on the trashiest show we've got."

"Someday, Son, this unnecessary and outdated stuff will all be yours."

"Good For You / Bad For You"

Heavy man sees 'Comfort Food' aisle

"We won!"

'Protein, starch, vegetable??? When you said 'square meal' I thought PIZZA IN A BOX!'

A golden Big Boy holding a plate of poop

Menu Dating

"Is that your idea of a well balanced diet"

Doctor to man with 'Push' door on mouth: 'It looks as though you've been eating a lot of junk food lately.'

"Sis, my teacher said to list the four food groups. . . but I can only think of three. Cookies, candy and ice cream!"

"He says that when he had a vegetable salad as an appetizer, he can now have burgers, pizza and Coke as a reward."

Sweet surprise.

Vending machines with junk food: 'Zing!', 'Zoom!' and 'Crash!'

'They say that poker is a sport. I hope they don't start testing for steroids.'

'Forget worms. Think fast food.'

"Mom lets me eat my fill of junk food as long as I can pronounce all the chemical ingredients."

Fountain of Youth/Fountain of Bacon

'I can't conceal it any longer - the food in this place is killing you.'

NASA HEADQUARTERS, ACME VACUUM CLEANERS, 'Hi! - I understand that space is full of junk?'

Great moments in 'Haute Cuisine'. . . America gives the world the Donut Sandwich.

'I just got the medium popcorn this time.'

"I'm searching for a happy medium between sitting on a mountain top and eating cheese fries."

Empty Calories Vending Machine.

Fishing rod coming out of a health farm towards a hot dog stand.

His Written Work Wasn't Very Good But His Practicals Made Up For It.

Student Food Pyramid

"And what would the, Truth-in-Advertising tribunal, want to speak to old Rudy about?"

"They should have quit after deep dish."