Junior Coach Pillows

'One day you'll be able to 'sack' a football manager.'

"Good game."

'Reading, writing and arithmetic are important, son. Someday you might sign autographs for money.'

I hope a starting salary of 80 and a severance of 12 is acceptable....

'This job is for a 30 hour week. . .but to achieve that you need to work 60 hours a week.'

I like the Jets...I guess

'And remember to emphasize we're giving them the opportunity to find a better job.'

Others will fight for you

"Those aren't coconuts, they're tennis balls." "Sweet mother of Novak Djokovic!" The island of lost tennis balls.

Reach for the Star.

"Just another 50 decibels on your grunt and we can start to think about letting you hit a few balls!"

Business books - Who's Who & Who's Downsized sections.

'Don't think of it as being a yes man, think of it as being an employed man.'

'Very impressive educational background...now let's discuss WHO you know.!

'I love your cardiovascular system!'

"There will be a winning team and a losing team. Are you OK with that?"

"Still, diving for it would look good on my college application.

'What distance! Pity it wasn't the hammer!'

'Sure beats your cupping your ear!'

'I clawed my way to the top and then I clawed my way back to the middle.'

'These goalscoring celebrations are getting out of hand.'

"I hate performance review season."

'Thou shalt not steal...except for bases.'

The trauma of losing.

"Good game, good game, nice game, namaste, good game, nice game ..."

Go! Means NOW!

Time Is Money

"A journey of a thousand miles begins with a MAP, actually."

"Hiring someone to replace me and then expecting me to train him just doesn't sit well with me."

A married couple share the same pole vault.

'Yes, Jenny, I know I'm always reminding the team to be good sports, but you really don't have to thank the ref after every call.'

'Pass it to Dewey! He's got himself into some kind of rhythm!!'

"And the letterbox version, how does that make you feel."