Judicial System Explorer T-Shirts

Frankly, I'm dubious about Amalgamated Smelting and Refining pleading innocent to their anti-trust violiation due to insanity.

"Obama didn’t get to name a Supreme Court justice during his final year. So how come Trump does?"

"Not guilty by reason of genetic determinism, Your Honor."

"According to national law you're innocent but national law counts less than. . ."

"That settles it. I'm moving for a retrial."

'I bet this is going to be another round of criminal bashing, isn't it?'

"And here's good news for the defense. I am disqualifying myself on the grounds of blatant prejudice."

Lawyers - Man challenging a barrister

'Well people who said the SRA wasn't up to the job are going to have to eat their words now.'

'I've been charged with evading jury duty.'

Supreme Court Rules Suspension of Parliament Illegal

"I'm Mr. Trump's attorney and this is my attorney. Once his attorney arrives, we can begin."

"Hi guys. I'm Lawyer man, and my power is of attorney."

A judge, the lawyers for the prosecution and defense, the accused and the jury stand in front of a packed courtroom and bow while holding hands like they are finishing a performance.

With Jury Duty for All

We Remove Lawyer Residue

'Might as well get comfortable. The appeal process can take forever.'

"Hi, I'm your court-appointed lawyer-whoa! Don't tell me you've been executed already."

"To the unsophisticated, I suppose, I'm guilty."

'Your honor, before we get into the issue of black and white, I'd like permission to slip into my grey suit.'

'The kid is being tried as an adult. The old man is in his second childhood, so he's being tried as a juvenile.'

"May we have a moment, your honor. My client hasn't quite memorized the script."

'If the verdict is guilty, Mr. Foreman, simply say 'Guilty.' Please refrain from shouting 'Yer outta here'....'

'Try to think of it as early parole.'

QC appointments fall to all time low.

"Heads or entrails?"

'Okay, the print media convicted you...but trust me, the video media will overturn the verdict.'

"This court has a zero tolerance policy."

''The truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth'? -- How patriarchal can you get?'

Graduation at the executioner's school

'The Constitution guarantees you a speedy trial -- so hold on tight!'

'Three years? But that's aaaaaaaaaages.'