Judge's Assistant T-Shirts

'I think you have figured out that, with today's overcrowded prisons, pleading insanity will put you back on the streets..."

Trial by Media

"Good boy."

"Obama didn’t get to name a Supreme Court justice during his final year. So how come Trump does?"

'I'll be late for dinner, dear. I'm up to my neck in paperwork.'

'Am I being too suspicious or do you think it's possible that they're crooked?'

'Whe they said 'God is my Judge', I didn't realize He was a real attorney.'

In basket-case.

"Counsel for prose is overruled. Poetry, you may continue."

"Morning, all!"

'When I grow up, I'm either going to be an authority figure or an unimpeachable source.'

"What do you recommend for someone being tried in absentia?"

'What happened to that efficiency report? I had it in my hand not two minutes ago.'

'I request an postponement, Your Honor -- I have to study for my bar exams.'

'Can he call you back? He's taking time to stop and smell the profits.'

No Parking - Scandal or No Scandal

"O.K., O.K., people - we're not workshopping these, they're already set in stone."

"Your Honor, we're going to go with the prosecution's spin."

'How do you plead, in twenty-five words or less?'

'Look -- I'm willing to forget about all this if you are.'

"Amen. . . void where prohibited by law."

'So Captain Ahab, I put it to you that you were deliberately stalking my client!'

"He's the chief watchdog, who watches over all the other watchdogs—but this must be his night off."

I love Lawyers

Good Luck!

'Court's in recess!'

Barristers

'It wasn't long before Larry realized his calling as a lawyer whisperer...'

Ruth Bader Ginsburg - Forever Supreme

"Now that's a win."

Well HERE'S some good news...Judgement Day has been replaced by a multiple choice questionnaire.

"You call this a constitution?"

Shake it all about sign on desk

My Brother Al once went through a period of depression, your honor. He would just sit around in his robe all day. Then his psychiatrist got him out of his funk. Would you like to have his doctor's phone number? ? ?

"After I graduate middle school, high school and college, I'll go to law school to get you out of this. But I want my retainer now."