Journey To Parenthood T-Shirts

'He's more supportive after his nap.'

"Frankly, now that he's an obnoxious teenager, I find it more and more difficult to muster the urge to protect him..."

"I'm starting him off with a little rope theory."

'He has your nose and my ears.'

"It's so nice to finally put a face to the name."

"I thought it would be nice if we had a forum where we could get together and have screaming tantrums."

"Congratulations—It's a well dressed boy."

"It may not look like it to you, but trust me, he's hyperactive. It's exhausting!"

"Entering Minivan Territory: Healthy Snacks Strictly Enforced

"And that little pinpoint of light? That’s our new baby."

'I've drawn up a shortlist of baby names.'

'The suspense is killing us. Which one is our grandchild?'

"I'm so good at this!"

'Think about it guys: We're fed and sheltered, why would we ever think about leaving the nest?'

"I knew we agreed that you could be a stay-at-home dad, but that's when we decide to have children."

'Son, the world is ripe for the taking ... you better stay home with me.'

"I'll probably die an old woman before I get that bedtime story."

'OK Mr and Mrs Johnson let's spin the wheel and find you a child!'

'This is not fair, mom. . . none of my friends is forced to hibernate before December.'

"Congratulations! It's a pain in the ass."

"Boy, the kids are growing up so fast!"

'The trick is to make it look as easy as possible while, underneath, you're paddling like hell.'

'You're due in September, however, since you're not mentally ready, let's make it October!'

"Dad—will the heroine go into rehab?"

Biker couple with their baby in a side car.

Kids really do make you view the world from a different perspective...I'm on the floor, behind the couch, under the bed...

'I don't want you to think I'm a maniac or something, but we haven't had bunnies for over a week now.'

Doctor has the taste for patients urine samples.

"You need to stop pressing the snooze button on your biological clock."

"Don't worry, Emily. . . I'm woke and you're woke, so I'm sure our baby will turn out woke!"

Biological Alarm Clock.