Joker With A Pint Prints

'If I'm an agnostic, what's an atheist?' 'Never mind that. If I'm an atheist, what's an agnostic?'

'The fun begins when we go through airport security.'

Child laughs while making farting sound under arm. Dad says, 'Isn't it nice when they find something they're good at?

Get crazy once in a while

"Ok... for today I want a 500-word essay on what you know about nothing."

"Would you rather get hit by a racket or chewed by a dog?"

'Want to freak her out? Stare over her shoulder without blinking for 10 minutes.'

"It's from the local micro brewery..."

Never pick a fight with a comedian.

"Of course you can't put your finger on it. It's a hypothetical particle."

"It was a botched surgery."

"Harold, stop sucking in your stomach when the girls walk by. You're going to hurt yourself."

"One more question, Mr Cake. How do you feel about wearing a sheet, creeping about people's bedrooms and saying 'woo'?"

'I've heard all about you. Jayne says you're quite the prankster.'

'Moses, you'd better be in that bathtub!!'

"It's me, Lucky—you can drop the best-friend shtick."

"What do you mean, you 'feel funny'?"

"We could have a shoot-out, then brunch."

Here lies BoBo the Clown

Toilet humour

'Let it go, will you? -- That whoopie cushion incident was years ago!'

"A valiant effort, Mike, but just accept that you're going bald."

Adult Absence Notes.

'He's making preparations for his elderly care.'

No infrastructure problem here

'This is the third time you've gone to the bathroom tonight. Are you seeing another woman in there?'

Mr. Bubbles was beginning to regret sending his son off to clown college. 'Is that what they teach you, up at that fancy school of yours?!'

"Everybody's a comedian. When I asked the clerk if he had this size bolt, he laughed and asked, 'What are you - some kind of nut?'"

"Now go home and forget about your amnesia..."

Shenanigans at the Leper Colony.

"He must like you. He wants you to share his whoopie cushion."

"His legs yurn to jello when he wears Relaxed Fit jeans."

A clown & his clone.

'A room with double beds, please.'

'Your Chef's Surprise, sir -- a sauteed whoopee cushion.'