Jockey's Ally Pillows

"Hang on a minute! We do the running and jumping, but the rider always gets the prize money, the cup or the medal!?! You're kidding me right?"

"Lassie, go get help!" "Oh Timmy you idiot! Not again!"

'I'm a vegetarian.' - 'If it's so wrong to eat animals, why are they made out of meat?'

Alice in Wonderland: The Queen Turns into a Pack of Cards.

"And the winner is… Dan the Man by a nose!"

Rocking Horse

A day at the transgenic races

The Epsom Derby - The Finishing Line

'Humans seem to be so weight-conscious: My rider weighs himself before each race...'

Gentlemen Riders

First past the post.

Angler sees sign that says 'Good Spot'. He says, 'This looks like a good spot.'

Runner going through hurdles.

Labrador for sale

"It is just as the Oracle foretold!"

Horse racing puns

"I can't believe how much I love her. Just look at those sienna eyes and that adorable little nose. I honestly don't know how I'd survive without her." "He has food."

"Did you see neighhhhhh...bours last night?"

The Derby- Horse Auction at Tattersall's

"You've been a virtuous employee, Thornhill, and that is it's own reward."

'Well, I can't find anything in the rule book about it.'

Sporting maladies.

Advertising space on jockeys' bottoms

Stout gentleman: 'That's the way to get over a gate! I don't think you left me so far behind that time.'

'I'm racing him in the 4.30.'

'Aside from a crazed sheep now and then, this is a very risk-free profession.'

Dog hides eyes as car turns into vet clinic.

'Last again. I hope you kept a diary of your trip.'

'Talk about lack of trust! My trainer didn't even bet on me, but I showed him: I won the race!'

Sporting maladies.

"It's their big annual event—the Run for the Roses."

"Ninety days, catnip-free. I couldn't have done it without you."

'What he lacks in speed he gains in nose.'

"I want to be a Jockey."

'Do you think he'll win the second race?'