Job Quirk Collector T-Shirts

"Your job will be to furnish the office with fresh fish on a daily basis."

"We found the poor thing stranded on the beach last summer and decided to adopt it."

Larry's used art

Seagiraffes

"Don't worry about your purchase not working. Everything we sell here is totally non-functional."

'The ghost walks this passage every night Monday to Friday. He has weekends off.'

"I warned you not to use that club...now look, you struck oil!"

"Will you have a Sphinx?"

Cut out and keep your own Christmas Caterer.

Raincloud Umbrella

"Sorry. I just find rotating my head helps me to relax during the test."

Duck Hunt

Thinks he's too cool for school.

Early cyborg.

"He also barks, meows and makes noises like a hamster."

"I don't know about you, but it always makes me feel kinda special."

Best before 65 million BC.

"Trust me, this is as weird for me as it is for you."

'I'm surprised you like being your own boss. I am your boss and I hate it.'

"Dear? The toothpaste is on the top shelf. Don't touch the tube on the bottom shelf, that's Grandma's triple strength epoxy denture adhesive."

"Now that's what I'M talkin' 'bout!"

Ice shelfie.

"Oh, I'm thrilled with my new dog! He's sort of a hunter/retriever/plumber/electrician."

A man walks his dog wearing a cone.

"If you'd like to take a seat."

"I don't think our smart home likes the color we painted it. It keeps spitting it out."

"Now, why didn't I think of that?"

'Anorak anoraks'.

A trevor of trainspotters

Freaks of nature exhibit.

Fred Dinsdale - Forensic expert.

Dog selling toilet water on front lawn

'Don't you think it's just a little weird to have a cemetery for houseplants?!'

It's great for pulling the birds!

Inflating Boobs.